May Alba|10.01.2014|Feature Real stories Someone Like Me
I get the “you’re a slut” treatment often…so what!

Last time I started dating someone I said: “If you want a relationship, please don’t come near me, because this will be your biggest f**k up.” The only thing I can offer is this: I’m going to love you if I fall in love with you. I’m going to be with you for as long as I feel like I want to be with you. I can’t give you the “exclusivity package” unless I just don’t feel like f**king or loving or dating other people. But if I ever stop loving you, or if I don’t want to be with you anymore or if I want to date or flirt with other people, I’m not going to wait 2 weeks to tell you. I’m going to be honest about it so you can make the decision you feel is appropriate for you.

You won’t need to go through my messages, you won’t need to wonder or feel any obligation whatsoever. The only thing we’re doing here is living. And the moment you feel like it’s time to feel safe, you can go on and find that somewhere else.

At the same time, I want openness from him (or her) and I say it clearly: if you want to be with, or feel interest toward, or are flirting with, or are dating someone else, let me know. My heart will not be broken whatsoever, and I definitely will not ask you to stay with me. It’s your life and your freedom. You respect mine, I respect yours.

I get the “you’re a slut” treatment often. It might be a reflection on what others wish they could be and of the things they simply dare not to do. I couldn’t care less about their prejudice. I just keep living, because there’s only so much time left on the clock, and there are still many more things (and people) in my bucket list, so I’ve got to keep moving.

This is me, in full honesty. I am not perfect, but I do my best to help those I can reach, and I stay grounded, living for the now because that is all I have. No unattainable promises. No surprise plot twists. No drama. No lies. Straight-up truth, liberty, honesty, and that’s it. The moment I stopped idealising and judging people, including myself, I became free.

I hope you can be too.

May is one of the stars of our documentary My Sex Life & Everyone Else’s, which featured on MTV UK. Watch it here.

Follow May @maycupcake

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